Goats use their Heads to get Bonus Point

Skerries 50
Ards 7

As the faithful filed away from Rockalyoke after the long whistle on Saturday last, someone was heard to remark that "the lads are using their heads now", it wasn't clear whether this was a compliment to some intelligent constructed tries or a reference to the fact that two Skerrigoats had left the field with possible concussion after laying their heads emphatically on the line. The first victim was the indomitable Kelleher who was already launched on of his kamikaze missions when the visiting no. 7 decided to drop his head as he met the contact. The clash of craniums had the effect of a sharply potted black, Gray was subsequently met by the same fate as he attempted to blast his way through a collective tackle on half-way. "Linford" Horan, the hard-line prop, was also said to be seeing double after the game, although that may have been confined to his time at the Hospital, for those who haven't heard - his wife presented him with twins on Tuesday.

A week of wind and sun had gone a long way towards dehydrating the pitch and local hopes that a firm sod would constitute the laxative to relieve a chronic constipation in the try-scoring system. And if not the ground perhaps the sturdy young mascot that led Skerries out would act as talisman on the day. But for the best part of an hour the idea of a try-scoring bonus point seemed like the idlest of pipe dreams. Lethargy was the selected gear and the passing, apart from one silken transfer from Early to Beggs was numbingly perfunctory. One man who did operate at higher voltage from the beginning was the renascent O'Sullivan who has again taken to swatting up his books on bilocation. The No. 7 was at the hub of every advance by the goats and the ensuing pressure yielded two penalties by Brady and one from Dempsey. Shortly before the break Duff sniped a try on the heels of his pack to take the overall benefit to 14 points. Ards, to their credit, tried to play rugby on limited rations and were admirably free of the calculated infringements at ruck which are endemic in the game of today. Woodlock, visibly concerned, was circling the pitch with what appeared to be a set of jump-leads but the Skerries battery remained flat for sometime after the oranges, ( It transpired that the one-time winger was carrying the mobile video with trailing cables). Butler had signaled his entry to the game with a spectacular break - a feat he was to repeat later - and now he was the one at the nucleus of the packs collective drive for the line. Dempsey converted from wide-out. The third try was the liberating one, Early ran hard and in the tackle fed Beggs on the inside, the full-back transferred swiftly to Brady on the outside and the young center, reputedly on a days leave from his death bed, stretched irresistibly to the line, fifteen minutes remained in which to secure the bonus and all risks were legitimate. At least that's the way Beggs interpreted it. The man who mixes the sublime with the ridiculous in equal measure threw a speculative pass into midfield and Ards accepted it as their crumb of consolation.

The golden try, the fourth one, was arguably the best, O'Sullivan, ceaselessly vigilant, pocketed an attempted clearance kick in midfield and sheared instantly right, his pass was wayward but Kelleher plucked it down as if he was picking blackberries. Kelleher's pass in turn was marginally misdirected and Lawless was obliged to rock in the blocks. Once in his stride though Lawless was all cylinders and he scored on the site of his saving tackle of four weeks previously. Brady's kick from the touch-line went over courtesy of an upright.

It was now show time and some of the chorus were invited to perform in front of the footlights. Dunnes mercurial running precipitated a few nervous breakdowns in the visiting defense and Hynes with a "Y" put his range of passing on display including one aesthetic dive clearly stamped "made in Garbally". The home pack was increasingly rampant and Higgins, by conspicuously retaining the ball back to half-way, made sure he would be credited with what, in essence, was a collective try. Mulcahy, in typical Buccaneering style then made the line for the second week in succession and Brady hurdled through some frail tackling to appropriate the final try of the day - one that was saluted with some needless triumphalism by the Skerrigoats. How soon before we see the try-scorer pulling his jersey over his head to reveal a t-shirt with topical imprint "No dump at Rockalyoke" or "Save the Skerries 100". Suggestions on a postcard please to Dropout, Milverton.

The coveted bonus point has elevated the Goats to second place in the Official League table at the half-way mark. That however, is a status of little significance. A class system is increasingly in evidence in the third division and, while it is comforting to know that Skerries belong to the aristocrats, the fact is that the real competition is only just beginning.